|Image by Leroy Patterson on Giphy|
When I was 16, I discovered the band Save Ferris. They were in that sweet ska/rock crossover space right when ska/rock was still a thing. They sang silly songs about spam and how much it sucked to be a teenager. WIN!
The last song on their album It Means Everything was called "Everything I Want to Be" and it was the song of my soul. It carried me on wings like an angel through the Land of Hopes and Dreams and wrapped my heart in a saxophone-infused rainbow. It was my aspirational song of optimistic futures that would never materialize, but I didn't know that yet.
It was everything everybody has ever meant when they refer to a song as their jam. (Which I originally thought referred to the kind of jam you eat, as in "this thing is as delicious to my heart as jam is to my mouth," because jam is such a delicious thing, why wouldn't you turn it into a descriptor of other things you love?)
1) This particular song was NOT a single nor was it famous at all. It was the last song on the track and I may be the only person who knew all the words. (Okay, they had more fans than that, but let me feel special. It's what the song is about.)
2) I have maybe listened to this album one or two times on Spotify since I became a Spotify-listening person, and I don't think I have ever singled this song out in particular.
3) Spotify has a new-ish feature called Your Time Capsule with a collection of songs to make you all nostalgic about your past. It's generally pretty easy pickings: mine is full of rock and pop from the late 90's. I'm a 33 year old female, so they know that I sang longingly along with Six Pence None the Richer's Kiss Me like a zillion times. Done.
4) I am not getting paid by Spotify to talk about them this much. I wish I was.
THEY PUT "EVERYTHING I WANT TO BE" ON MY TIME CAPSULE PLAYLIST!
I was alone in the office when this happened and wanted to jump and scream and sing along but there was no one to be excited with me. Then my coworker came in, but he wanted to talk about work and I just wanted to sing as loud as I could in his face. AWKWARD.
Seriously, though, have internet algorithms gotten so good that they can see into your history pre-social media? Can they somehow sense that, even though I only listened to that album a couple of times on the internet, I did so with such joyful abandon that it was extra special to me?
Do they know that I am an adult person who was once a teenager full of dreams and that this song is about dreams and also that I liked ska and so I probably liked this?
I am not mad. I am not creeped out. I am just impressed. And grateful. So grateful.
Give it a listen:
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