Tuesday, August 30, 2016

Do the kneel and yell

You know in movies and TV shows when a person is so overcome with emotion that they fall to their knees and yell at the sky?


I think this needs to happen more in real life.

Here are situations where I think falling to your knees and yelling at the sky is completely justified:

Dropping your ice cream.

Dropping your Jello.

Dropping a bottle of wine on the street and seeing it smash.

Okay, for simplicity, let's just say dropping food that is any kind of delicious treat that is soft, sticky, liquid, shatter-able, or otherwise malleable enough that it is instantly ruined by contact with the floor.

Stubbing your toe (or breaking it, like Viggo did when shooting the above scene).

Missing the bus by mere seconds.

Your coworker showing up late for a meeting.

The ice cream shop being out of your favourite flavour of ice cream, when you know they had it earlier that day. (Okay, the last food-related one, I swear.)

Getting invited to do something really fun but you already have plans and you can't flake out on someone just because something awesome came along because you have been trying to get together with them for three weeks and are a better person than that and being a better person is HARD and then you see posts on Instagram of your friends all going for a fun hike without you when you were just plain old hanging out with this other person LIKE A FOOL.

Coming home to see that your roommate has moved where you last put down the book you are reading and you have to look for it and why can't things just stay where you left them???? (Bonus yelling points if you are one of those people who cares about their books looking pristine and unread and they cracked the spine or dog-eared a page).

The internet being slow. THE INTERNET BEING SLOW.

When you could really use a cuddle, but instead of curling up in your lap with you, your cat walks just out of reach and sits on a plastic bag on the hard floor, making the distinct point that he/she would rather sit on a plastic bag on the floor than touch you.

Finishing a book that was really good and now you're sitting on the bus and you don't have another book to read and you're going to be alone on the bus with your own thoughts for at least 10 more minutes. (Please note the multi-layered issue of both being finished a good book and getting shunted back out into the world AND having nothing else to read.)

When a sidewalk is really crowded and your in a hurry and you just want to get past, but people keep shifting so they are just in front of you and you are completely powerless to do anything about it.

The thing you were just working on didn't save and the computer did something weird and now it's gone.

Printers and/or photocopiers. Anything with printers and/or photocopiers.


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