I Would Like to Introduce You to My Celeb Family

New idea: a reality show where regular people submit the list of celebrities that were important to them growing up. It's called My Celeb Family, and they get to hang out in a house full of the actors, singers, writers, or other such people who were not only ever-present as they grew into themselves, but perhaps even helped shape who that person would be.

Here is my submission for what My Celeb Family house would look like:

The Grew-Up-Next-Door Bestie: Amy Grant


Amy Grant is the classic bestie. She is fun and lighthearted, but knows when to take something seriously. She will encourage you to jump off the end of the dock when you're scared but won't push you in, keeps all yours secrets, doesn't make a mess when she paints your nails, and gives very thoughtful advice. She is always free for a sleepover, invites you to go on family vacations with her, and gets double prints of all her photos so you can have one.

The Weird Aunt: Celine Dion


Auntie CĂ©line always brings a present, but half the time you have no idea what it is. She will sit at the kids table whenever she can and tell wild tales with the most vivid facial expressions you've ever seen. If she decides it's time to go, time for dinner, or really time for anything, she will probably announce it by bending her knees deeply and singing it at the top of her lungs, pointing whichever way we need to go. She cries very easily. Whatever problem you have, she will tell you to go after the most daring solution, and always believes in love.

The Family Elder: Oprah


Most people call her Mama, regardless of their relation to her. She always has either a tea cup or a glass of red wine in her hand. She listens to everything you have to say, gives concise but rich advice, and if you go out with her she knows almost everyone in town. No matter how old you are, or how simple your experience, it always feels like she is really interested in what you have to say. She introduces you to people like you really matter.

The Soul Mate: Sarah Slean


Sarah the soul sister you meet in high school, just when life feels like it's turning inside out. You talk about whatever is on your heart right now, and she says, "oooooh, I know what you mean," and it really feels like she does. She feels everything to the deepest depth possible, eats only organic, makes her own jewelry, and will create a ritual ceremony for whatever ails you: heartbreak, test anxiety, confusion about the future, or parental woes.


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