This morning when I was in the bathroom I heard a buzzing coming from the Evil Closet of Darkness. I'm pretty sure the buzzing was the giant killer bees regrouping. It sounded like there were a lot of them. Meaning, it sounded like I might actually have some kind of nest inside my home. I cannot say enough how much this scares me. An actual HIVE of giant killer bees? REALLY UNIVERSE? WHY????? I cannot for the life of me think of what I may have done to deserve this.
Just in case, let me try to make some amends and try to fix my karma:
Krista, sorry I read your diary when we were in elementary school and wrote about it on the board in my class.
Mark, sorry I was so mean to you when we were kids and kicked you in the head and splashed water on your face those two individual times. Also, all the other times I was mean or hit or kicked you.
Mom and Dad, sorry I was the best child you could ever imagine having. I know it made it harder for you to love your other children. Also, sorry for being so indulgent in my pride just now.
OKAY UNIVERSE????? Now no more bees.