Photographers are creepy

My roommate is having a photoshoot in the living room with his man-crush friend.  Over the strains of "Take it Easy" and other easy-listening motel room classics, I hear him murmur the following using a voice one might call "dulcet":

"Nice, very nice."

"I'll just ... adjust your shirt..."

"Now to pleasure you."

"I just want to get it perfect."

"It's surprising I'm having such a hard time with this."

"A little bit closer to me.  Little more.  Little more.  Good."

"The more you pay the deeper it goes."

"Okay, one last safety."

"You see what I was doing there?"

"Let's go back and try one more."

"Are you okay with that? ... I need to know!"

"Let's take one of me!"

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