Living Alone: The Downsides

Living alone is generally the best.  You talk to people when you want to talk to people.  You stand in your kitchen "not eating" a bag of chips and dip and have to justify your actions to no one.  You have dance parties in your living room sans commentary.  You decorate your home exactly the way you want to and can work out in your living room any time of day wearing whatever level of clothing you feel like.  You sing songs to your cat without an audience and never have to negotiate the television.  Generally, it's bliss.

However, sometimes, there are things you just need another person to do and it can be tempting to drop into a dramatic hunch, sob dramatically, and cry out "I AM SO ALONE!"  Or am I the only one who does that?


When you're congested and can't smell to tell whether or not the shirt you want to wear stinks, but you really want to wear the shirt.

When you really really don't want to get up to do pretty much anything, there is no one to try to bribe into doing it for you.

If you come home at the end of the day and your door is left partially open, the only possible explanations are psycho killers or your own incompetence.  (And generally wondering if there are psychokillers in your home and checking behind shower curtains by yourself every time you get home.)

When you are trying to put a box spring under a mattress that's on the floor and the room is really small so you don't really have enough space to just lift the mattress on its side and lay the box spring down and then slide the mattress on top of it, and even if you did, that's still a lot of maneuvering to do all by yourself and the mattress might fall down on you.

Hanging art, or anything else really, that needs to be level. I mean, don't get me wrong, you can still use a level, but trying to balance the level, identify the spot you're going to put the nail, and then hold the spot, all while holding your frame in the right position and not dropping anything is TRICKY.

Those stupid jars that sometimes just cannot be opened and at the very least it's nice to have someone else confirm that it is, indeed, impossible.

Hoping someone else will take out the garbage for once.  Or scrub the shower.  Or do whatever the job is that you really really hate doing and put off for as long as humanly possible and roommates have generally picked up the slack on, but I figured it was okay because I washed their dishes and cleaned the toilet and counters.

No comments:

Post a Comment